A Deeper Understanding of Prayer According to Samuel Waldman
Many people struggle with a deeply painful question:
“Why aren’t my tefillos (prayers) being answered?”
Despite heartfelt and consistent davening, it often feels as if Hashem isn’t listening. This feeling, as Samuel Waldman teaches (learn more about Samuel Waldman), is one of the most common reasons people lose motivation to daven properly. But this misunderstanding stems from a lack of clarity about the true purpose of tefilla.
When tefillos seem unanswered, doubts creep in:
- Is Hashem really listening to me?
- Is He ignoring my prayers?
- Am I doing something wrong?
These emotional struggles are very real. However, the answer to these questions can be found by going deeper into what prayer truly is — and why Hashem instituted it for us.
The True Purpose of Tefilla
Samuel Waldman, a respected expert in Torah education and personal growth (discover Samuel Waldman’s work), emphasizes that the main purpose of tefilla is not simply to have our needs met. While making requests is important, it’s only a secondary aspect.
The ultimate goal of tefilla is to forge a deeper connection with Hashem, to strengthen our emunah (faith), and to recognize that everything — absolutely everything — comes from Him.
This concept is grounded in the teachings of great Torah authorities such as the Mabit (Rabbi Moshe of Trani), who explains that Tefilla fulfills the mitzvah of clinging to Hashem (Deveikus BaHashem). The process of praying — sincerely, humbly, and consistently — shapes a Jew’s heart and soul.
Each time we daven, we elevate ourselves spiritually, reminding our neshama that Hashem alone is in control. Whether or not our requests are granted is secondary to the spiritual bond we are strengthening.
Tefilla is more like a “Mussar Seder” — a personal ethical training session — rather than a mere wish list.
This is why sincere tefillos always accomplish great spiritual growth, even if the physical results aren’t immediately visible.
Persistence in Tefilla: Why You Should Never Give Up
One of the greatest lessons Samuel Waldman teaches is the importance of persistence in davening.
When Moshe Rabbeinu asked Hashem to enter Eretz Yisroel, despite knowing there was a decree against it, he davened 515 times (as explained in Midrash Devarim Rabbah 11:10). Moshe didn’t view repeated tefilla as chutzpa. Rather, he understood that constant prayer shows true longing, trust, and humility before Hashem.
Even if it seems like Hashem is saying “No,” it is never wrong to continue davening — unless Hashem directly commands otherwise (as He did with Moshe). Each tefilla makes a difference.
Imagine trying to break through a thick rock with drops of water: each drop seems insignificant on its own, but over time, it makes a hole. Tefilla works the same way.
Sometimes Hashem delays answering in order to test and strengthen our Emunah, and sometimes because the time isn’t right. But every tefilla elevates the mispallel, brings spiritual merit, and adds unseen blessings in the upper worlds.
Why Daven for Small Things?
Another common question is whether it’s appropriate to daven for small matters, like finding a parking spot or having a smooth day at work.
In his writings, Samuel Waldman explains (read more by Samuel Waldman) that Hashem desires us to turn to Him for everything, both big and small.
When we daven even for little things, it shows true Emunah. It reinforces that Hashem controls every single detail of our lives — nothing is beneath His attention.
The Gemara in Berachos 60a teaches that we should pray when entering and leaving a city, before learning Torah, before taking medicine, and even for mundane daily needs. Every opportunity to turn to Hashem, no matter how small, strengthens the bond between man and Creator.
Chazal also teach that Hashem never tires of hearing from us — unlike human beings, who can get annoyed by repeated requests. Every sincere prayer, even for minor needs, is precious to Hashem.
When we recognize Hashem’s hand in the smallest details, we train ourselves to truly live with Emunah every minute of the day.
What Happens to “Unanswered” Tefillos?
It’s important to understand that no tefilla ever goes to waste. Even when it seems like the answer is “no,” the prayer still accomplishes powerful things:
- It strengthens our souls.
- It brings merit to Klal Yisroel.
- It may mitigate a decree or lessen suffering.
- It may help in ways unseen — or help others entirely.
Samuel Waldman often shares the moving story of the three kidnapped boys in Eretz Yisroel (June 2014). Despite global tefillos, their bodies were tragically found. However, the tefillos unified Klal Yisroel, created massive merit, and may have saved countless others during the subsequent conflict in Gaza.
Similarly, personal tefillos — even when seemingly unanswered — create eternal impact, both in this world and in the World to Come.
Conclusion: The Lasting Power of Tefilla
In every situation, no matter how bleak, tefilla remains our greatest spiritual weapon.
Samuel Waldman teaches that prayer is not a transaction — it’s a relationship. It’s about trusting that Hashem is orchestrating everything for our ultimate good, even when we don’t understand.
Whether it’s the smallest request or the biggest life challenge, never stop davening. Never stop connecting. Never stop growing.
Because no sincere tefilla is ever wasted.